The Birthday
by kwayland
Summary: It's Lily's birthday and Severus decided to meet up with her and rehash some of the past as well as give her a birthday present. It's set some time before Lily marries James.


He saw Lily walk into the park, her eyes scanning for any sign of him.

"Sev? Where are you?"

Severus jumped from the bushes, hoping to give her a scare. To his satisfaction, Lily flinched slightly. He ran up to her, wrapped his hand all the way around her tiny one and led her to a large tree in the distance.

When they reached the tree, Lily saw a small present lying underneath. Before she ran up to it, Severus grabbed her gently by the shoulders and stared into her sparkling green eyes.

"Happy Birthday, Lily. And thank you for coming. I realize your fiancé probably wants to spend the day with you, and that you don't really want to be here."

"Sev, you were my best friend and Dumbledore told me I could still trust you. So, as far as I'm concerned, I do want to be here."

"Dumbledore said you could trust me?" surprise etched into his voice..

"Yes. He said that you would never do anything to hurt me. He obviously knows something, not that he would tell me what."

Severus looked down at the ground, shuffling his feet. He composed his face, peered back up, and smiled. "Go ahead and open your present. I hope you like it."

Lily smiled and lifted the small box from the ground. She shook it lightly, then ripped off the light blue paper. Inside was a small picture book. The cover was wood and delicately etched with a pattern of leaves, vines, and flowers that resembled Tiger Lilies. Lily's smile grew and she hugged it to her chest.

"Thank you, Severus. It's beautiful. I love it!"

He swelled with pride. "I made it myself. I find those presents to be best," he said, quoting Lily from one of her birthdays years and years ago.

Lily's hand flew to her mouth. "Oh, Sev. It must have taken you ages, you shouldn't have..."

Snape put a finger to her lips, but quickly withdrew it.

"I thought you might like somewhere to keep pictures of your life with James. Your new life. I thought you...especially you...would enjoy saving the best bits and pieces."

"Thank you," Lily whispered, and enveloped Severus into a hug. He immediately understood that she wasn't only thanking him for the album, but for accepting that James, who he despised, was now a part of her life.

He released her gently, looking anywhere but her eyes. "Another reason I gave you the album was because I want you to remember me. I know that you don't want me anywhere near you or your family because of what I've become, but you have such a kind heart and are going to protest to never seeing me again. With this album you won't have to. I'm weaved in with the vines."

"Sev, I just got you back. I'm not going to lose you again."

"Lily, the taunts and general dislike of our relationship will be worse than it was at school, especially since we haven't been friends recently. And besides that, you're marrying a man who is the complete opposite of me. I don't belong. It's better this way."

A defeated look swept over Lily's face. She had lost the battle, maybe even the war. She coulnd't believe he was already halfway gone. Again.

"I have to go now, Lily. I'm being missed. Tucked inside the album is a letter. I'm begging you to read it. That is my last request to you, as a friend."

Severus gave her a tight squeeze and then sauntered off, Lily desperately calling his name. A tear trickled down her face as she put her finger under the flap of the envelope and tore the letter open. It was written on parchment with a border of gold leaf. She glanced down at the letter and decided it was now or never.

_My dear Lily,_

_If you are reading this letter, then you came. I thank you for that with every ounce of gratitude I have left. I have written you this letter to clear up the years we haven't seen each other. Why it happened._

_I called you a Mudblood._

_I wanted to tell you the day I threatened to sleep outside the Gryffindor common room, but you wouldn't listen. I don't blame you for that. You'd had enough, and even if you had been listening, I would have made up something else to say because I wouldn't have been able to force the words out. I probably would've made it even worse, if that was even possible._

_I wanted to tell you, other than I'm grievously sorry, was that I love you, and I have since the day you jumped from the swing and flew through the air and landed as gracefully as a cat on the ground._

_I want to tell you know that calling you a Mudblood has been and always will be the biggest regret of my life. Ahead of turning to the Dark Lord, which is my second greatest regret, because you despise him and everything he stands for. I also wish to tell you that since that day, I haven't called anyone a Mudblood. I now loathe the word, thanks to you. You will always be the light at the end of the dark tunnel that is my life. Untouchable but necessary._

_I realize none of this matters, which is why I left. You are marrying James Potter, and I wish you all possible happiness._

_I will never forget you. Never._

_Please don't write me, as I know you want to. It will make leaving and staying away from you twice as painful._

_Take care of yourself, and those you love. Losing them is heartbreaking. Hold them close._

_Love,_

_Severus_

_P.S. There is one last gift for you inside the oak tree. Don't feel as though you have to use it, but I thought you might want it. Actually, I just hoped._

Lily folded up the letter, tears streaming silently down her face, and stumbled over to the oak tree. She reached inside and pulled out a little box wrapped in gold. She peeled off the paper and slowly opened the box. Inside was a necklace with and oval-shaped locket. She unclasped it and found another note tucked inside.

_Lily,_

_For the letter. If you would like to keep it close._

She tore the piece of paper in half and gave the shreds to the wind. She folded up the last of Severus and placed in in the locket. She set the necklace around her neck and tucked it beneath her shirt. She would never take it off.

"Thank you, Severus," she whispered to the wind. "I already miss you."

Miles away, the whisper reached Snape's ears. A flicker of a smile flitted across his face; the last of his life.


End file.
